The Pro vs The Amateur

"You say you're going to do a lot of things, but you never actually do them." 

Damn.

That hurt when she said it. Still hurts now. I thought she was supposed to be my friend? I assumed she'd like the idea and support me blindly (as a good friend should).

That was about 10 years ago when I mentioned to a friend that I was going to build my own company. I was going to change the way companies did training. I was going to use humor, ideas from psychology and self-development, and storytelling to make things actually stick for people.

I didn't take any action for another 8 years. Not because she said that, but because she was right; I did have a lot of ideas; there was a ton I got excited about but never actually executed, at least not consistently.

We all have an area of our lives where we're stuck – fitness, career, relationships, money – and although we have the best intentions, we can have trouble following through. It's normal, but how can we overcome this? 

About three years ago, I had a shift in my mindset and behavior that has finally helped me follow through on some of my ideas. It's a mindset that I also noticed in my most successful clients embody.. 

Turning Pro

Steven Pressfield is a best-selling author who wrote The War of Art. A must-read in its own right, but Pressfield has another lesser-known book called Turning Pro that had a huge impact on me. 

In the book, Pressfield says there are three "models of self-transformation."

The first he calls the "therapeutic model." This model says that there's a "condition" that ails us, but once we remedy that condition, we're good to go.

This is the "I'll be happy when.." model of self-development. I'll be less stressed when I win the lottery. I'll be happy when I find my dream partner. I'll relax after I get the promotion. The therapeutic model tells us that we need to get something in order to grow, and we can usually get it for three low monthly payments of $19.99.  

This model can provide a short-term boost for transformation, but it's typically a very low level of transformation driven by scarcity. We're often left feeling unfulfilled even when we get the girl, the ring, the dollar, or the VP position.

The second way is the "moralistic model," which basically says the reason we're unhappy, we are told (or tell ourselves) is that we've done something "wrong" or there's something wrong with us that needs to be fixed. The self-help industry has turned this model into a multi-billion dollar arena. The idea is that we need to "fix ourselves," and then we'll "be happy. We'll finally be whole and be living our best life.

The third model that Pressfield introduces in his book is the model of the amateur and the professional, what he calls "Turning Pro." Pressfield says that our problems lie in the fact that we're living our lives as amateurs instead of professionals.

Amateurs dabble. They're on-again, off-again, easily swayed by distractions, but not fully committed. They do something when it feels good or when they feel motivated but generally avoid discomfort. Amateurs wait for inspiration to strike. They start new things with excitement but eventually fizzle out. Life gets busy, and that jazzercise video tape gets put in a box, and that treadmill becomes a place to hang laundry. 

But the professional makes the decision to show up no matter what. A pro is committed to the process, even when it's uncomfortable, inconvenient, hard, and without immediate results. Professionals don't wait for inspiration; they put in the work daily, even on the days they don't feel like it (especially on those days). 

Three years ago, I launched my podcast but would only do it "when I had time" or had "good ideas." Then, two years ago, I committed to putting out an episode every Friday, no matter what. No matter who listened. No matter who liked it. I decided to turn pro.

One year ago, I started this newsletter, and my good friend Daniel liked to joke about that "It was the weekly newsletter that came out once per month." Then, in March of this year, I committed to executing that whole "weekly" part. I decided to turn pro.

Turning Pro is a mindset and process. Whenever we start any sort of change process, inconsistency is NORMAL. It's okay. But a pro doesn't spiral. A pro doesn't beat themselves up. They deliberately re-engage in the process. 

I've noticed two benefits. The first is obvious – I've gotten tangible results. I signed multiple clients, hosted dozens of workshops, gave talks, and built a few courses. My skills are improving, and my revenue is growing. All of which you'd hope for.

But there's been a second, pleasantly surprising benefit. Turning Pro opens up some other avenue of our psyche. Pressfield writes: "What we get when we turn pro is, we find our power. We find our will and our voice and we find our self-respect. We become who we always were but had, until then, been afraid to embrace and to live out."

This has been really eye-opening for me. By showing up week after week and taking my business seriously, I've noticed some internal shift. I've developed a silent confidence. I'm way more detached from whether people love or hate my stuff (but I'm still human, so be nice.). 

I've developed an element of self-respect.

And it makes sense.

Why would we respect ourselves if we don't keep promises to ourselves? How can we be taken seriously when we don't take our own commitments seriously? By showing up consistently, holding ourselves to a professional standard of our own making, and delivering over and over, we're demonstrating to ourselves that we respect ourselves. Just as we watch and judge other people based on their behavior, so do we watch and judge our own behavior.

We can't expect others to respect us until we respect ourselves. We can't expect to be taken seriously by others until we take ourselves seriously. And we start to take ourselves seriously when we "turn pro."

Inverted Thinking

The late Charlie Munger, the brilliant investor and partner of Warren Buffett, often talked about something he called "inverted thinking" — approaching problems by flipping them upside down and looking at them through a different lens. For example, instead of asking, "What leads to success?" Munger flips the question: "What guarantees failure?"  

The answer, he says, is clear—sloth and inconsistency. If you wanted to guarantee that you wouldn't be successful, you'd be sure to be inconsistent with your actions and be purely guided by your feelings (I don't feel like going to the gym today, but I do feel like eating buffalo chicken dip off my chest while I watch NFL RedZone).

This is what Pressfield's idea of Turning Pro accounts for. The very human experience of "not feeling like it" or "I'll start tomorrow." My dear friend Jillian Teta always says, "It's easy to be all good when everything is all good,"

This week, I'm out in LA with a ton of work on my plate. I didn't want to write. I didn't want to record a pod. It's the first time in a while that I wanted to phone it in.

But here I am, trying my best to walk the walk. Giving it the old college try. Because that's what the professional does. They honor their commitments to themselves. 

Amateurs take things casually; pros take it seriously. For amateurs, it's something they'll do if they have the time. For a pro, it's a priority—they make the time.

An amateur is driven by feelings and external validation. A pro is driven by purpose and internal standards. They don't need to be told by others they're doing a good job; they know when they're on track and when they're off.

So, what could you be more of a pro at in your life? What's something you'll double down on no matter how you feel? Now go do it. Start small, start now.

Alright, it's time to get out of here because I didn't even want to be here in the first place.. 

But I showed up… 

Because that's what pros do.